I'm feeling unsettled tonight, like all is not right with the world, and I feel tired and restless all at the same time. Comfort seems to be the theme of so many of my prayers lately. Every time I answer the phone or check my email, there is pain or news of pain on the opposite end. Death, illness, heartbreak, and confusion, in response to which I pray but cannot find any words. People turn to me for wisdom, and I have none to give. I just want to somehow take it all away so that they can once again experience ease of being, not burdened by sadness, disappointment, and fear. And tonight, my own heart is heavy. I have fears of my own; emotions that can run wild with my heart unless I keep them reigned with my will. Hope is a slippery thing. The belief that tomorrow will not be too much, nor will the next day, the next week, the next month, the next year, is a hard-won prize and much appreciated gift, or at least it is for me. It comes from denying the lie that I am left to figure things out all by myself in this life. It comes from fighting every temptation to think that God is anything short of good, that His plan is anything less than best, and that His gaze towards me is anything but love. Tomorrow, the emotions will be different. Perhaps hope will be handed to me with the fading of my morning dreams, or perhaps I'm going to have to pray to God to help me see beyond heaviness of my heart. I pray for the former, but I accept the latter. Amen.